6/21/2006

Little Brother Is Watching

According to today’s Tennessean, the Metro Parks Department is getting its very own eyes in the sky. Video cameras are going to be installed in Two Rivers, Cedar Hill and Hamilton Creek parks in order to discourage sex. Apparently these parks have been publicized on the internet as places to go for sex.

What do they plan to do if they see something going on? The article says that the cameras can be monitored at park police headquarters, or in the squad cars. So are they going to have someone monitoring these things constantly and dispatching officers? It seems like this would be pretty time consuming and more trouble than it’s worth.

The video will be stored for an indeterminate period of time. Will they be going back and looking at the recordings to find evil doers? I can just imagine a special section of the Tennessean, or the Metro webpage with photos of all these people. Let’s just ruin a few lives. And being public record, anyone should be able to go and request the footage. You heard it here first, this stuff could be the next big innovation in porn. The Girls Gone Wild folks will save a ton of money just grabbing free copies of the surveillance footage and editing out the dull tree parts.

The biggest question I have is related to this quote:


the department would not publicize exactly where the cameras will be placed, because "that gets into actual law enforcement operations."

Correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t the point of this to make the cameras a deterrent? Seems like the best thing to do would be to publicize the locations, just to keep people honest. Granted, telling all the exact locations would just make it easier to avoid the cameras. But if they’re hidden, then no one will believe they’re really there. So maybe something along the lines of “here’s 15 of them, but the other 5 are hidden.”

I also like this part.


Police have found cameras to be a deterrent in areas under surveillance, though criminals often move to places not in view, Aaron said.
"You're not going to eliminate the criminal activity altogether, but perhaps displace it."

Translation: “When we can afford it, we’re going to have to put cameras in all the other parks. So get used to the idea.” It's a self perpetuating cycle. They’re already putting cameras on 2nd Avenue and Broadway downtown (at least those are going to be purposely highly visible), so we have this nice slide into more monitoring. The next step will of course be stop-light and speeding cameras to make us safer (and augment the Metro budget). One of these days they’re just going to hire psychics and, and arrest us for future crimes. Don’t like it? Why not? What do you have to hide? Huh punk?

Just take the money and hire two more park police to go shoot the people with tasers while they’re trying to have sex behind the tree. It’s so much simpler.

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